Sunday, January 13, 2008

Sharing your Woes VS bitching

This is what's happening: I am in charge of marketing, yet there is very little budget for me to play around with. As such - my product remains relatively low-key. When I confide about it with my colleagues, and my boss happens to hear about it - I am considered having bitched about the company, and having spread negativity around. When my colleague shares with me her side of problems and I relate my own experiences to her, we are considered to have bitched about the company.

So - How do we draw a fine line between sharing your woes and problems and bitching?

Here's what I feel:

Sharing your woes - To speak with sincerity and truth about the problems one face, and in the midst of sharing to get positive advice and even maybe some comfort. Sharing your woes however will definitely have negative mentions about something or somebody - be it your unproductive work or your demanding boss. Usually you only speak about it to colleagues you trust.

Bitching - To speak negatively about a certain subject to many people in the company, and there may not be truth in the words. Bitching comes with an "evil intention" - be it to sow discord between 2 persons, to spread negativity in the company or otherwise.

How do you then get out of a situation whereby your boss blames you for having bitched about the company and demoralized the team?

In my situation, I put it across very directly to my boss that I did not bitch about the company in any way, and that my colleague and I were merely sharing our problems. If he chooses to believe that I am still in the wrong, so be it. There is nothing much I can do about it. A good boss should devise a way to help his staff out and get to the root of the problem. Only then will the "bitching" stop, isn't it?

If you have been through such situations and handled them effectively, do share by commenting on this post. Hope to hear from you soon. :)

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